Never Give Up

Well, I'm 30 now. Its funny how old that seemed at one point in my life. . . Now I'm ready for it! I love that I'm 30, and I feel like this next decade is going to be fabulous. I've been thinking a lot about my post last week, especially in light of my birthday. If you didn't see it, I had shared about my (frustrating) tendency to change who I am and how I act depending on the people that I'm around.

The thing is, though, that when I wrote that post I wasn't writing it in a discouraged or defeated way. I had seen something in myself (well, with the help of a certain love of mine pointing it out), and was processing the good, the bad, and the ugly. I didn't cry (amazing!), and by the end of the discussion/reflection time I was actually encouraged thinking about what God can and will do through me.

That, my friends, is why I'm excited to be 30. Not making sense yet?

You see, there is a beautiful thing that comes from age and experience (though you don't need either of those things to gain it!) called maturity. Just a few short years ago if anyone I loved pointed out a sin issue in my life I would crumble to the floor in tears and self loathing. I was incapable of receiving constructive criticism without letting it effect my own feelings of self worth.

But now, God has done this crazy thing in me. He has given me this unwavering confidence in where I stand with Him. He has affirmed in me His great love and unfailing mercy, and I am not afraid to discover (and consequently share) my weaknesses and struggles with others. I'm not afraid because I finally understand and believe that they don't define me.

I am a child of God. I am loved, forgiven, redeemed, adopted, and filled. I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine. . .

On some level I will probably always be fighting my people-pleasing tendencies, but I am aware of that propensity and continually pray and work towards a single-minded, Christ-pleasing mentality.

I am running after Christ and throwing off the hindrances that distract me from my cause. I'm not sinless, but I know I sin less. And when I do stumble along the way the path to repentance seems much clearer than it did before.

When you feel overwhelmed and discouraged with your sin, and when it feels like you will never turn that corner and be completely free, remember that sometimes it isn't until you turn around and look back that you realize how much you've really grown.

And when it is difficult to see growth even there, take your eyes off of your struggles and remember who you are, and whose you are. . .

Ephesians 1:3-11 (the message):

How blessed is God! And what a blessing he is! He's the Father of our Master, Jesus Christ, and takes us to the high places of blessing in him. Long before he laid down earth's foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son.

Because of the sacrifice of the Messiah, his blood poured out on the altar of the Cross, we're a free people—free of penalties and punishments chalked up by all our misdeeds. And not just barely free, either. Abundantly free! He thought of everything, provided for everything we could possibly need, letting us in on the plans he took such delight in making. He set it all out before us in Christ, a long-range plan in which everything would be brought together and summed up in him, everything in deepest heaven, everything on planet earth.

It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.