Then there was the day that I decided to wear a headband with my bangs pulled back. That might not seem like such a crazy idea to you, but if you understood the issue with my forehead you would have gasped in horror at the mere suggestion. . .
I guess in some ways I was lucky, because the issue with my forehead could have been a lot worse. It could have been all over my face. You see, I had a pretty bad acne problem underneath the bangs that I so desperately wanted to grow out (you can imagine the dilemma there, because the bangs covered the acne - which was good - but they also were most likely the cause of the acne - which was bad. . . oh, the stress). Anyway, it was nice having bangs to cover it up because most of my friends never noticed it was there.
If you really want a better picture of my complete ridiculousness send me a message and I'll tell you the nickname I gave the upper portion of my face. . . oh, words cannot describe. . .
Anyway, you can imagine the shock of my friends and classmates when I walked into school that fateful day with a big black headband holding back the curtains that so delicately concealed my imperfections. I think the worst moment of the day was definitely at lunch when a friend called out halfway across the lawn outside the cafeteria, "Erin! I didn't know you had freckles!!! . . . oh. . . sorry."
OUCH!
Ok, so why am I telling you such awful and embarrassing things about myself?
Because I think its important for you to know that I experienced those things. And I survived. In fact, I am grateful for experiences like those because they taught me a lot about what really matters in this life.
Maybe you're the kind of girl who never gets embarrassed. Things always seems to work out just right, and everyone seems to think you're pretty much perfect in every way. You never say things you wish you hadn't, wear things you now realize looked ridiculous, or look at yourself in the mirror and wish you had a giant magical eraser.
Oh, wait. No, that isn't possible. There is not one girl on the face of this planet that actually believes she has it all together. But you realize that we often think that about each other, don't we? If only I was like "____," then I wouldn't feel like this.
But the truth of the matter is we all face awkwardness of one kind or another. I can promise you that there is is not one girl on this earth who goes to sleep at night smugly thanking God that He finally created the perfect human. But Satan does a really good job of convincing us that this isn't true. He twists reality and successfully convinces us that we are alone in our awkwardness.
And let me ask you a question. What happens to our ability to love others when we see ourselves as imperfect, broken pots and them as perfect, flawless creatures?
Our love evaporates.
I cannot tell you how many girls I distanced myself from when I was younger because I saw them as something I could never be. I was angry that they had the privilege of waltzing through life without suffering from the annoyances of imperfections. Oh, but I was so wrong!
Those girls were hurting, too. And even if they didn't deserve my love, I was called to love them anyway. . . and show them the very grace and mercy they often refused to extend to me.
In Philippians 2 it says:
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
That verse is a pretty huge call for us to live out the love we've received in very real ways. But we have to be careful about how we read and understand verses like that one. When Paul (the guy who wrote those words) tells us to consider others better than ourselves that doesn't mean that we place them on a pedestal. The bible also tells us that "all men (and all girls) have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23)".
Jesus shows us what true love looks like. It doesn't ignore imperfections and deny sinfulness. . . It says to those in our midst, "I know you aren't perfect and that you don't deserve my love. But I'm going to love you anyway."
I think one of the first steps towards being able to show this kind of love to others is to recognize that we aren't so different from each other after all. You are a beautiful child of God, loved beyond measure. And so is the girl sitting across from you at youth group that you can't bring yourself to love because she is everything you wish you were. . . or she has everything you wish you had. . . or she acts like nothing in life bothers her when your life seems to fall apart daily. . .
Remind yourself in those difficult moments that she needs Jesus just as desperately as you do.
Remember who you are and Whose you are, and refuse to be selective when you distribute His love to those around you. . . no matter how much or how little they look like they need it. . .
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