Becoming a Navy Chaplain's Wife

Do you need to reread the title and make sure you're not seeing things?  It's not a typo.  On Friday, June 14th, Matt was commissioned as a Chaplain in the Navy.  Based off of most of the reactions we've received when telling people the news, I'm guessing this is a surprise to you.  That said, I thought I'd take a moment and tell you how we got here.

Here's our story...

About 4 years ago Matt and I were processing through a potential transition.  We talked about a lot of possibilites; going to another church, planting a church, going on staff with Campus Crusade, etc etc.  One afternoon Matt threw out the possibility of becoming a Chaplain.  I don't remember my exact response, but I am quite certain it was an emphatical no, probably emphasized with some intense and unkind choices in wording.  Needless to say, he never brought it up again.

At that point in my life it was an impossible and awful thought - my husband being away from me.  I was sick just thinking about what life would look like in that scenario.  I signed up to be a pastor's wife, not a chaplain's wife, after all.  I wanted to serve God and sacrifice my life - to a point.  Apparently chaplaincy was a little too far beyond that point.

Life moved forward, and we continued ministry in the context of a church setting.  We continued to talk about the possibility of doing something outside of the local church one day.  Our passions and personalities sometimes seem more wired for outreach-focused ministries...  But again, chaplaincy was never even a thought that crossed my mind.

Until one Sunday in November, that is.

It was Veteran's Day, November 11th, 2012.  Our church celebrated the occasion in typical fashion - honoring our veterans, displaying an American flag, and playing a slide show of all of those connected to our congregation who have served or are currently serving.  It was a nice service, but there was honestly nothing out of the ordinary that day.

Until God spoke.

Ok - I know that sounds potentially weird.  And kind of charismatic.  But I'm telling you - if you could have felt what I felt in that sudden and life-changing moment you'd say it that bluntly too...

No... I didn't actually hear an audible voice.  But out of no where I felt a weight on my chest - like my heart sunk right down to my toes.  Not in a bad, devastating way, but in a moment of sudden clarity and vision. It happened in an instant.  There was no question in my mind as to what God was speaking to me.

You are going to be a chaplain's wife.  

You are going to get over your selfish fears and stand next to your husband on this journey.  You are going to love on the young moms and lonely wives whose husband's are away.  You are going to wash their dishes, make them dinner, and babysit their kids.  You are going to erase the line and serve and sacrifice to the very end of yourself.

Matt wasn't sitting with me during this little revelation.  It was an interesting conversation when we were both finally home that afternoon.  I think I said something like this:

"Matt, this is going to sound weird.  But I felt like God was speaking straight to me today.  And I think He was telling me that you're supposed to become a chaplain."

As I remember it, Matt broke out into a wide smile that seemed to shout "Finally!"  I wouldn't say it was something he had been secretly longing for the last 4 years... but I do think it was something he had wished was at least an option on the table.  So from that point forward it was all about researching, and talking, and praying, and talking...  I think we processed together more in those first months that in our almost 10 years of marriage.

Each step of the way we sensed affirmation that this was what God was calling us to.  Our hearts kept growing in excitement for the life and ministry that this would provide.  When you sit down and think about it, it makes sense.  Matt's greatest joys in ministry to this point have been all of the things we've done to serve and love on our local communities.  He gets most excited when we're out just doing random acts of kindness as a youth group.  He loves giving people a tangible picture of the love of Jesus.

As a chaplain, he'll have the opportunity each and every day to serve.  He'll have the privilege of showing support and extending compassion to people coming from every different kind of life.  He'll come face to face with individuals whose beliefs are similar, and with those whose beliefs are completely different.  And he'll get to minister to and love on them all.

What a privilege.

I can honestly say that I'm excited.  Don't get me wrong - thoughts of deployment and separation are painful.  But the confidence I have in my God outweighs those fears.  I know He will be with me - I will never be alone.

So the next step in our journey begins.

The kids and I will head to Colorado to stay with my family while Matt is in Officer Training and Chaplain school.  By the new year we should be headed to our first destination.  We're hoping its overseas...  but we're willing to go wherever.

Now don't get me wrong - through all of this excitement there is a sadness in my heart about leaving this place we are now.  I am so grateful for this church and the many people who have come alongside us, encouraged us, and walked with us.  You are treasures to me, and I do not move forward lightly.  But just like I know and believe that God has called us and will go with us - I know that He is calling you and is standing next to you as well.

You're on an adventure, too.

And if there is any advice to give from what I've learned over this last year, it would be this:  that thing you've been saying "never" about?  Well, just don't be surprised if that's the very thing that causes your heart to sink down to your toes and your chest to burn with excitement one day.

Erase the line.  Follow Jesus wherever He leads.

It won't always be easy... but it will be worth it.