Jesus Journal: Whose Praise?

July 21, 1999

My time with the Lord was great again today.  I realized after the awesome day I had yesterday what a difference this makes.  Satan even started getting scared and tried to pull me away using a weak point from my past.  What he doesn't get, though, is that in Christ - even my weak points are strong.  

More and more I am learning how much I do for praise from people.  I pray that I will finally understand that attempting to win praise from people wins me 0 praise from God.  Whose praise would I rather have?

Alright - how awesome is it that I just declared that Satan is scared of me?  Seriously?  Awesome.

So the summer when I wrote this I was on a missions trip of sorts.  I was living in Fort Collins, Colorado with ~60 other college students.  It was the summer after my freshman year, and I was the youngest girl on the trip.  We provided day care during the week days, and spent the evenings and weekends studying the word, sharing our faith, and having lotsa fun.  It was awesome.

 That summer was when I really started to understand the power of having your own, personal relationship with God through His word.  I started reading my bible more consistently.  I tried to study it and meditate on it, not just casually (or halfheartedly) glance at it and move on.

Honestly, I don't remember what "weak point from my past" I was referring to there.  I could probably guess, but in the end I don't think it matters.  What I am so grateful for is that at 18 I somehow understood that sometimes our struggles and discouragements are meant to pull us away from God.  I recognized that truth, and in that moment I refused to allow it to happen.

That isn't always the case.

I'm 31 now, and I still know that this is true, but I often forget the power I have in Christ; that He is my strength - even in my greatest weakness.  It might be true, but sometimes I forget to live like it.

And that second paragraph, well, everyone say hello to Erin's thorn.  This struggle - the desire to earn praise from others - is probably the biggest battle I face.  And unfortunately, I face it daily.  I haven't conquered this yet. . . I do think I'm getting better - God is working in this little heart and helping me to see that no amount of praise from other people will ever fill me up, but I still struggle. . .

But this post doesn't just show an unbelievably mature and insightful 18 yr old (I wish). . . no, unfortunately it also betrays the heart of a girl longing to follow Jesus who sometimes fell into the trap of legalism.  Did you catch that?

It happened when I expressed the people pleasing struggle.  I  said that instead of winning praise from people I need to win praise from God.  There is a very fine and dangerous line right there, friends.  Its the one that seperates God's praise from God's favor and love.  I believe that God does offer praise when we are living out our faith and following in the footsteps on Jesus.  I'm not sure I would ever say that we "earn" that praise, but I do think our actions can inspire it. 

On the other hand, God's favor is something we could never earn.  And that is where my legalism can come into play.  Sometimes I am fooled into believing that my actions can earn God's favor.

Let my state this clearly:  the Christian life is NOT about winning God's favor.  We already have it.  There is nothing I could ever do to get God to love me more; His love is limitless already.

I was right about not trying to win the praise of people - that is true.  Trying to get people to like us will only leave us feeling exhausted, discouraged and usually defeated.  But the alternative isn't the same.

When we turn from people pleasing, we get to simply accept the favor and love of Christ that has been extended to us even in our sinful yuckiness. 

The praise we receive when we walk in faithfulness is the icing on the cake of the love and favor that is already ours.  So I think that question I posed is a good one, so long as we understand it correctly.

Which praise would I rather have?

The praise I have to earn by being something or someone that others like?  Or the praise that comes freely in Christ, together with the favor that is already mine; signed, sealed, and delivered the day Jesus died on that tree?

I don't know about you, but I choose Christ.  Yesterday, today, and forever.