Worship

Almost every Saturday night Matt and I lead worship at our Saturday night service. We started the service almost a year ago with a few other couples in our church. When it began I had these visions of how God could use it in our church and community. I was so excited for what God was going to do. . . or, at least, what I thought God was going to do.

I do believe that He is using the service to reach, grow, and encourage people who have not yet made a connection with the more traditional types of services offered here. But I think perhaps the person most changed through this process so far is me. Its funny how you come into something thinking that you have it figured out; like you know what's missing and how to create something good. We had some good ideas, and some not so good ideas. The service has changed and grown as we have changed and grown, and I have been humbled time and again as I realize that I will never have it all figured out.

My absolute favorite thing about Saturday night is the worship. I had never led worship until we moved up here 3 and 1/2 years ago. It was nerve wrecking and stressful at first. I still get nervous every time - but God has done this amazing, freeing work in me. . . and every Saturday night when I sit behind that keyboard and begin to sing I feel the most powerful, intimate connection to my God. I am moved beyond words and encouraged and inspired beyond understanding. Worship is my love language with God.

But truth is what motivates those feelings. Like I wrote yesterday - we can't base our faith on feelings alone. I cannot base my trust in God and the quality of my relationship with him on how good the worship felt at church. If, however, I understand and acknowledge the truth in the words; if my worship is stemming from a deep understanding of what Jesus did for me and what that renewed relationship means - well, then there is hardly any way for me to worship without being moved.

I love Saturday night. I love sitting at my piano and singing to my Savior. He is worthy of all my praise and all of me. Every day we have is a day that we can offer ourselves to him. Next time you are in church singing songs - close your eyes and imagine your Savior standing in front of you. . . holes in his hands and love in his eyes. That isn't manufactured emotionalism.

That's truth.