I AM that crazy mom

Here I am! Alive and kicking and wading through each day as best I can. I have not lost contact with the world, though one might fairly assume that to be the case if you go by the frequency of my blog posts. The truth is that I have started a completely new season of my life and the adjustment time is taking a little longer than I had anticipated. I am now a mom of school aged children, and four mornings a week I have to have us all out the door and in the car by 8am. Amazingly, we've succeeded each morning we've tried so far. And in a lot of ways, I am absolutely loving the structure and routine that school provides.

The unfortunate reality is that I am no longer able to sit at the computer for an hour before the kids arise to articulate the depth of my thoughts on everything in life. I'm going to have to find another time to write.

And the truth of the matter is that I don't have much to say. It isn't that life is going wrong, or that I am disconnect from my Maker and Savior, or that I am struggling with any particular area of life. Quite the contrary, I am feeling incredibly blessed and encouraged in my faith; I am seeing God's hand move in amazing ways every day to provide for our needs and sustain us. This has been a fabulous season so far. . .

But for some reason, I'm having a hard time articulating any one particular thought. I have started to write at least 3 different posts, but none of them have ever seen completion. Today, however, I feel pretty strongly that I need to share what God is teaching me now. To do that, though, I need to share a thought I had the other day while shopping:

Matt and I had traveled down to Illinois to spend the weekend with his parents and my mother-in-law was watching the kids so that I could run some errands. I was in a store all on my own when I heard the unfortunate sound of a screaming child. I actually thought to myself, "Oh, Lord, thank you so much for giving me children who don't ever scream in stores or throw fits in public. It must be so difficult for women whose kids misbehave."

No, I'm not kidding - I actually thought that.

I am not going to get into the whole story of the events that followed culminating in my child shrieking through Marshall's and me throwing his shoes in the trash, but only remind you of that little saying pride comes before the fall, and let you know that I was swiftly kicked off my arrogant horse and reminded that neither my children nor me are perfect. As I carried my screaming child out of the store yesterday I suddenly had a revelation:

I am that crazy mom.

You see, sometimes its easy for me to get so comfortable in my little life that I forget that I am just as much a part of this fallen world as everyone else. I am just as desperately in need of God's wisdom, grace, and patience to get me through each day as my neighbor.

This morning I was praising God for His forgiveness and the truth that His mercy is new every morning. I am a sinner, not a saint. I will stumble and fall, but God's hand will lovingly pick me up, dust me off, and set me on my way again.

Hopefully I've learned a little lesson along the way here. Next time I pray that I'll handle the meltdown with more wisdom and discernment than I did yesterday. . . But in the in between time - from now until another fit comes - I hope that I'll remember to acknowledge in humility that none of us are defined by our meltdowns (or apparent lack of meltdowns) anyway; we are defined by our relationship to and dependence on the Creator and Sustainer of our souls.

I may be that crazy mom - but on a much more significant and eternal level,

I am that child of God.

Thank you, Jesus. . .

Glory to God

I know this will come as a bit of a shock, but sometimes I really love watching football. There are a couple of teams that I root for (I'll keep which ones to myself right now, thank you), but to be honest, I don't like watching football because of the actual game. I like watching football because of the stories. There are so many athletes who have pushed past tragedy, sickness, and devastation to become unbelievable players in their game. I think there is something so special about these individuals who have defied the odds and courageously stepped out onto that field. Yesterday I was quietly crying watching the story of one such player and his brother.

Their story is one that is difficult to hear. I didn't want it to be true. Elliott Mealer plays for the Wolverines. 3 years ago, though, the Mealer family was involved in an accident on Christmas Eve. The boys' father and Elliott's girlfriend were instantly killed. Elliott damaged his shoulder trying to roll the car over, and his brother, Brock, was paralyzed from the waist down. The doctors gave Brock grim news soon after. He had a 1% chance of walking again. Never mind the likelihood that their hearts would ever heal. . .

Horrifying. Absolutely heartbreaking. But these brothers were out on the football field yesterday - together. And Brock walked. Brock walked on the field with his brother. He was wearing a shirt (in Wolverine colors, of course) that had a huge figure on his chest: 1%. That was the number given to Brock by the doctors. He had defeated all of the odds. He had fought a seemingly impossible battle and won.

But the part that filled my heart beyond emotional capacity was what it said right above the 1% on his shirt. Glory to God.

A sportscaster sat down with Brock later during the game to talk with him about his experience. The reporter asked him where he found the strength to have such a positive attitude in the midst of such a tragedy. This young man smiled and shared that it had been his faith - the work of God his Father - that got him through it. There is nothing but the strength that God offers that can so miraculously heal legs, and arms, and hearts. . .

It was a powerful reminder to me. No matter what percentage we've been given for success in this world, God is bigger, and stronger, and wiser. Glory to God.




Glory to God.

Unbelievable

I have something important to tell you. You might want to sit down. Some crazy things (ok - one majorly crazy thing) have been happening these last couple of weeks, and I have been completely convinced (ok, well, I was convinced before) about a couple major truths. Here we go, ready?

God is real. And God is intimately involved in the details of our lives.

Remember that last post about being homesick and feeling an ache and a longing for the friendships and the home I left behind up north? Well, God did something wild on our 4 hour drive up there that completely changed my perspective and deepened my faith in His ability to do anything.

You see, we own this beautiful little home on Alma Lake in the Northwoods. We spent 2 years completely redoing the main level, and I was convinced that some happy couple would walk in, fall in love, and offer us our asking price within 2 weeks of listing it on the market! Oddly enough, that hasn't happened. In fact, it has been on the market for 3 months now and has only had one showing. No joke. ONE SHOWING! What is the deal with that?

So Matt and I were beginning to worry about how we were going to handle the finances and take care of this property and still be settled into life down here. As I blogged about a few weeks ago, I was terrified that seeing our house empty would make me sad; that I would long to fill it up again with laughter and yummy smells and tiny feet running around. . .

We were set to drive up north on Sunday afternoon. My job was to clean up the house and then Matt would mow the lawn before we headed back home to Oconomowoc on Tuesday. That morning at Oakwood Church a young family we had met at a bible study (the only bible study we have attended since moving here and joining this church of 800) commented that another couple in the study had just accepted a job offer in a town called Minocqua. If you are unfamiliar with northern Wisconsin, Minocqua is about 20 minutes from our home in St Germain. I laughed at the unlikely circumstances and joked about knowing a great home that they could purchase.

It wasn't until several hours later (in the car driving up north, in fact) when I told Matt about the crazy "coincidence" that he asked with wide, hopeful eyes, "Do you think they might want to rent our house?"

Duh. Hadn't thought of that. Amazingly, we happened to have another mutual friend's phone number with us in the car. I called that friend and mentioned our idea. She shrieked and said they were definitely looking for a place and in fact they had just posted on facebook how they were having a difficult time finding anything.

She gave us their phone number and by the time we were an hour away we had a meeting set up with the husband of this young couple to see the house the next morning (oh, I should note here that he was in St Germain, staying in a cabin about half a mile from our house).

Suddenly, my fears about seeing our house were washed away. I was so excited imagining this sweet couple living there and making it their own home. In one short, 4 hour car trip God provided for our needs (and their needs) - financially and emotionally. He showed up and worked out this crazy scenario. Who would have thought that a couple from our new church would move up north and live in our old house??!?!

And if you aren't convinced that God is in the middle of all of this, you should probably know that 1 year ago (before we had ever heard of Oakwood church) our street name was changed. Oddly enough, it was changed to Oakwood Court. Just sayin'. . .

I believe God is real. And I believe that God is intimately involved in the details of my life.