Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

Since I have entered the world of blogger.com I have come across several fun blogs to read. The other day I was perusing through the blog of another Christian woman when I found an entry that made me laugh. She was analyzing the whole idea of blogging and commented on an assertion that her husband had made that day. He had said that everyone who has a blog (or anything similar) is carefully crafting an image for themselves. . . that they post things that will make them appear a certain way.

The funny part is that as I read that I suddenly started thinking about what image I was presenting through my blog. And I laughed because the whole reason I started this blog was to escape the pressing urge to present myself so that I could simply be myself. I'm not really sure what image I have presented up to this point - but to tell you the truth - that isn't the point. As I have shared before, this is just a place to process and share truths about Jesus and how those truths effect our lives. And quite honestly - it will probably seem fairly repetitive. I learned a long time ago that I very rarely have any totally original ideas.

In college I went through a very short phase of guitar playing. I had visions of being a folksy, songwriting girl. That dream was squashed after I wrote my first song. I was performing it for another girl in my dorm when a mutual friend came running in saying, "Oh, I didn't know that you knew how to play that song! I love that song!" Once I realized that my first original work was simply a variation of previously written music I gave up on my songwriting career.

That said, you have probably already noticed the repetitive nature of my reflections. . . and hopefully you'll see the genuineness of my thinking. And over time - as God grows us all up in Him - I'll move past the specific issues I'm facing now and move on to something else. And then you'll have the privilege of hearing about that for a while.

Until then, here's to presenting yourself just how you are. . . totally unafraid and completely unashamed.

Revival

Last year I experienced my own little revival. . . Matt and I joined a group of youth workers and missionaries from around the world in the ancient city of Jerusalem. It was unbelievable to see the places where Jesus was born, began his ministry, and worked miracles among the hurting and sick. The lessons I learned in Israel are the same lessons I have learned for years and continue to learn to this day. . . but the freeing work that God did in my heart during that particular trip will last for a lifetime. I could try to rewrite the power of those moments, but instead I'll just share some of the words I wrote during that time. . . from my journal in March, '08:

"I think this is what might be called a personal revival. . . an awakening of sorts. God, you are so faithful in how you work in our lives. I can see now how you were preparing me for this trip. Awakening my spirit to my insecurities, reminding me of my past. God, I want to give my whole self to you - totally unashamed and with great courage and confidence. You are the God was, who is, and who is to come. All things will bow down before you one day - even those who might now look down on me. But really, I shouldn't even need that reassurance! I must learn to trust you fully, living in faithful obedience, walking by the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Praise be to the One True God!! You have taken this girl, with what little I have to offer, and you have given me a heart that longs for you."

As I've mentioned before, I have suffered from intense insecurities my whole life. I have always known that God loves me and accepts me fully just as I am - but sometimes that hasn't felt like enough. . . I have still longed for the love and acceptance of others too. When we were in Israel, surrounded by these amazing, passionate ministry leaders, I felt small and insignificant. I felt self-conscious and worried about how they were perceiving me. And when I recognized those feelings in myself - I was horrified!! Here I was, sailing on the sea of Galilee, and instead of soaking in the power and joy of being there I was obsessing over what others thought of me!! Gross. . . But, thankfully, the story doesn't end there. I remember one particular day when we visited the baths outside of Jerusalem where Jesus healed a man. . . I was suddenly, completely overwhelmed with the understanding that Jesus could heal me too. And every piece of me wanted to crawl under the fence and lay down at the bottom of the empty pool. I wanted to close my eyes and imagine myself being healed by the God who came down as a man to live and die for me. It was amazing, freeing, and life-changing.

Obviously, I still struggle with insecurity. . . I have to choose every moment to have the right perspective. I have to continually dig into the word for reminders of Jesus' power in my life to heal me more every day.

He's not finished with me yet. . . and in case you're short on hope these days, just know that he's not finished with you yet either.

"I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free." Psalm 119:32

Good Intentions

Its a cold, cloudy day today. . . one of those days where despite my idealistic plans to snuggle with a blanket and a book and meditate on life and God, I somehow end up laying on the couch channel surfing. . . Not what I had planned, I will admit. But it is a constant source of comfort to know that even when I am too weary to pick up a book, or my bible, and engage my mind - my God is still big, powerful, good, faithful, and present. He is who he says he is whether I am pouring over the beauty of Scripture or half-sleeping and watching Matilda on the Family Channel.

Now I'm up, and I think I'm going to give my original plan one more shot. . . I'm thinking I'll start in Romans 12. If your day has gone similarly to mine, maybe this little note is the motivation you need to turn your tv off and open your bible too.

Maybe try Romans 12. . .

Mirror, mirror on the wall

So I have been intrigued by this particular question for a little while now. I have heard passionate arguments for both sides of the issue, and I have passionately argued about it myself. I have been thinking about it now, because I am starting to wonder if my persepective has been a little off. . . Here it is (and sorry guys, if you're reading - you might want to skip this one):

Can a girl love and live for Jesus and wear a bikini?

Don't laugh. I seriously think about these things. The conservative Christian circles would easily and definitively answer this question NO. I would have answered the same way without doubt a few months ago. Now I'm wondering if on some level I was making black and white rules that Jesus himself didn't make.

There are verses in 1 Timothy and 1 Peter that talk about modesty and where true beauty should originate. . . but there is certainly no section of scripture dedicated to proper swimsuit attire. So, we must take the principles that God's word teaches and apply them to our context. My original thought was to do that for you here. . . but I've decided I'm going to let you do your own homework. I'll give you a couple verses (in the Message translation - though you should certainly read them in NIV or NAS as well), and you can read them on your own; make your own informed decision of how Jesus would want you to look not just at the beach, but in every scenerio you enter through out the day.

Ultimately, I don't think the question needs to be, "can I wear a bikini?" I think the true question is how deeply, intimately, passionately, and faithfully am I walking with God? The closer I are to him the more I will see the world the way he sees it and the more I will long to honor him in everything that I do. I don't ever want to get so tied up in legalistic rule-making that I lose sight of the simplicity of the Christian faith. . . Jesus summed it up in three words.

"Come, follow me." Mark 1:17

So as you open God's word pray for the wisdom that comes from his Spirit, and the insight to connect these truths to your life now. And if you feel convicted on any level - don't be ashamed, or afraid - boldly make the choice to change your life and live to honor God in all that you do!! He is worth any sacrifice - even your favorite bikini. . .

"And I want women to get in there with the men in
humility before God, not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it."
1 Timothy 2:9-10

"What matters is not your outer appearance - the styling of
your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes - but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in."
1 Peter 3:3-4

Simply Profound

Yesterday I had the privilege of hanging out with one of our graduated students for the afternoon. . . It was so fun to listen to the stories of her first year of school, and hear about all that God has done in her life. It brought back a lot of memories of some seriously good times, and it reminded me of the many ways that God grew me during that time of life.

I think the most significant things I learned were also the smallest and most basic things. When I got to college it was like I saw everything so much more clearly, and the things that I had been learning for years suddenly were real and powerful and amazing!! One particular afternoon I remember meeting my mentor at the union and exclaiming with joy, "The God of the Universe lives IN me!!!" My mentor laughed and asked me if I had just become a Christian. . . At that point I had been a follower of Christ for several years - but there was something that clicked in me that morning, and I understood in a new way the awe and wonder of what the Bible teaches.

If you really believe it - if you think the Bible is really true - then don't ever stop being amazing and awed at what God has done for us and what he continually does. As you read the Scriptures each day don't think of them as these far off Bible stories but as documentaries of the lives of your own family gone before. . .

Sometimes it seems so easy to loose excitement, passion and fire in the Christian life. We all go through desert times when we just don't feel close to God. But never allow those difficult times to convince you that the miraculous truths of the Bible are small, insignificant, boring things. . .

Our God is an awesome God.

Can I get a witness?

So I was thinking about the insecurities I referred to the other day, and wondering how you might overcome caring too much about what people think. . . then I decided I should probably take my own advice and look at the life of Jesus. He was obviously unconcerned about how people viewed him, and he broke a lot of rules that 'proper' Jewish men would have followed to be socially accepted. And then I came upon this verse in John:

"But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men. He did not need man's testimony about man, for he knew what was in a man." John 2:24-25

Jesus had just completed a round of miracles in Jerusalem, and as a result many new believers joined the ranks. . . it would have been easy for him to fall for the applause and become raptured by the adoration of his new fans. But John says here that Jesus refused. . . he refused to become dependent on their adoration or acceptence - he refused to find his own worth in the honor of their words. He did not need their adoring words. And here's the point for us:

We are all imperfect people. Most of the time we are more consumed with ourselves than the people around us. It is so easy for us to say and do hurtful things without intending to because we just don't always think it through. . . Jesus knew that the new believers who were lovin' on him might not always offer their love. He didn't entrust himself to them because he knew that if he did he would eventually face their rejection. Unfortunately, I know that there are people in my life who I have let down - people who entrusted themselves to me and then were disappointed. The only person who will love me and never let me down is Jesus. . . and when I lean too heavily on the adoring words of the people around me, I set myself up for eventual discouragement.

I'm not saying that we can't love and encourage each other, or that when someone compliments you it isn't ok to receive it and enjoy it. . . I'm just saying we have to be careful not to entrust ourselves to those people - to care more about what they think and say than what our God and Creator thinks and says. It is so easy to become self-conscious, and so easy to let other's opinions sway our convictions. I know that, because I've done it. . .

So today let's remember that Jesus is our best friend, our biggest fan, and the only man whose opinion is worth our lives. Let's live for Him today.

"But the Lord said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

Reality Check

Ok, so I think its time for another reality check (before I start looking more spiritual than I really am. . .) This whole blogging thing is super fun, and totally intimidating!! It feels weird to put all these personal, deep thoughts out on cyberspace and then wonder all day what people are thinking or if anyone is even reading it. . . I have decided that I can't recommend blogging to anyone else who suffers from piercing insecurity or obsessive people pleasing tendencies.

That said, I think this is the best thing for me. I may not always be as spiritual as I ought to be, but I do have a knacky ability to turn most anything into a spiritual opportunity. And this, my friends, is my opportunity. It is a chance for me to be open and honest about what I believe, what I'm most passionate about, and how I see God at work in my life and the lives of people around me. It is an opportunity to choose to care more about what God thinks that what you think, and it is my way of processing all of the stuff that goes in and out of my head all day long. . . In the end, I hope and pray that some of the words on these pages serve as an encouragement to you - no matter where you are at in your faith (especially for you girls in my life right now who are each day trying to walk with God despite the pressures that come with being young!). . . but ultimately I know that God will use this process to do a work in me, and for that I am forever grateful!!

So, I'll keep blogging and simultaneously trusting God to draw us all nearer to him however he chooses. . . (and you can pray for my piercing insecurities and obsessive people pleasing tendencies - ha!! lol. . . just kidding)

Good News

Have you ever thought about the fact that the word gospel actually means good news?? How many people in this world actually look at the gospel and think of it as that - good news? Do you? I read this fabulous book a few months ago that totally opened up my eyes to some missing links in the version of Christianity that many believers live out today. In the words of James Choung;

"If people only needed to accept this truth to be saved, then could a Christian go to heaven believing in Jesus yet hating Arabs? Could Christians accept what Jesus had done for them and still buy large houses, drive
Benzes, jet-set to Monaco, and dine on prime filet and Dom Perignon while giving nothing to people who foraged in a garbage dump to put food on the table? If they could afford it, Western Christians tended to go for the good life. So would they go to heaven? Caleb suddenly heard the
voice of Martin Luther King Jr. thundering in his head, quoting Amos: "Let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream!"

Where were these streams and rivers in the church? With the gospel of the bridge illustration, Christians didn't need to share their faith with others, stand up for the oppressed, become more like Jesus, love people of other cultures and ethnicities, take care of the environment or be concerned about the poor at all. If they just believed, they'd be in heaven, right? And they could still claim to have a relationship with Jesus. Everything else was just extra credit." (True Story: A Christianity Worth Believing In, pg. 32)

So, I don't know the answers to the questions that James asks there. I don't know what happens to those of us who identify ourselves with Jesus but live totally unconcerned about the world around us. Its not my place to decide their fate. . .

But I do know that when Jesus was here on earth the phrase he repeated often when calling people to himself was, "Come, follow me." When we follow someone, we imitate them, right? And when we look at the way Jesus lived, we have to admit that most of the time our lives don't look the same (I know that I must admit that for myself, at least). His attention was usually focused on the poor, the hurting, and the outcast. . . He crossed barriers of race and gender to show love to the people who least expected to receive it. When we accept his death on the cross as payment for our sins, are we not to then pick up our own cross and follow after him? Caring for the same poor, hurting, outcast people that he so lavishly loved in his lifetime here?

The gospel is good news. As we live our daily lives the world around us should look at us and see that though they might not agree with what we believe, there is no arguing that Christians who live out the gospel as Jesus did bring hope, peace, comfort and joy to the hurting people in this world.

May you walk closely in the footsteps of your Savior today, and may someone - even if just one - see through your life a clearer picture of Jesus.

Power

We had a fabulous sermon at our service last night. . . Francis Chan talked about God's great power, and what that power should mean to us as we live our lives. He talked about how we so often acknowledge truths about God but then live as if we had never heard them (ie. if God is so powerful then why do so many Christians walk around weak and defeated?).

It was a powerful message about a powerful God that inspired me to take another look at how my actions reflect my true beliefs about my Creator. I want every moment of every day to be lived in the realization that my God is stronger than any and all forces of bad in this world. When I am faced with difficult situations I want to trust in the same power that raised Jesus from the grave to give me the strength, wisdom, and courage to handle my struggles. I want to remember always that though life in this world is not easy, my Savior has defeated even death! What then would I fear?

After the message I read a passage of Scripture that encourages us as believers to know God and the power that so wonderfully works in us and on our behalf every single day!! As I share it with you now, know that I am praying these words for each and every one of you. . .

"That's why, when I heard of the solid trust you have in the Master Jesus and your outpouring of love to all the followers of Jesus, I couldn't stop thanking God for you—every time I prayed, I'd think of you and give thanks. But I do more than thank. I ask—ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory—to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life he has for his followers, oh, the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him—endless energy, boundless strength!" Ephesians 1:15-19

Follow the Leader

As I'm writing this my husband is watching a special on a world-class skateboarder. This guy is 41 years old and still skating daily. He owns his own 14 foot half pipe and sponsors his own line of clothing. At this point he could easily retire and enjoy the fruits of his labor - but he's still working his bum off to be the best skater he can be. I just heard him say, "I got to walk the talk. If I'm not living it, then I shouldn't be selling it."

I don't think any more needs to be said. When you read this little blog entry, simply ask yourself one thing:

Am I selling something that I am not living?

If the answer is yes, then let me suggest this; open up your bible and read about the man named Jesus. His death is central to the message of Christianity because it offers salvation - but his life is the only thing that can bring us freedom and purpose while we're still here on earth. He's a pretty good example.

He lived it.

Glue stick therapy

Tonight we had an event for the ladies at church. . . We made some cute cards and had some delicious treats and iced mochas. It was fabulous! The thing that stuck out to me at the end, though, was a comment made by the woman who put all of the card-making supplies together. (If you have never done scrapbooking or stamping - putting together make-and-take cards is a lot of work!!) After the evening was done and we were cleaning up she said, "I am so glad I did this. . . preparing all this stuff was theraputic for me this week."

So let's be honest here, how many times do we volunteer at church and say, "I am so glad I did this. . . preparing all this stuff was theraputic for me this week?" Or is the phrase that comes out of our mouths more likely like "oh my word, I'm glad tonight is done. . . that was a lot of work."

I think its possible for us to feel like my friend did tonight - if we're doing what we are really meant to do. . . A lot of people volunteer at church because they feel like they should, or because someone asked them and they feel bad saying no. The problem with that, though, is that then we don't particularely enjoy the service that we are doing. We get worn out and burnt out rather than feeling fulfilled and used by God. Maybe a better way of going about volunteering is finding what we truly love and figuring out how we can do that at church. Then everyone wins - because we will always enjoy our work, and our friends will get to experience the best parts of us when we serve. . .

Here's to the theraputic results of serving God and having fun at the same time. Cheers!

Never Alone

Do you know that God cares about the details of your life? That he can orchestrate seemingly silly events to accomplish huge things for you? Or do you feel like God is this big, angry cloud in the sky that is unconcerned with the daily circumstances that make up your life?

If you have ever felt like God was distant or removed from you, then you need to know that while those feelings are understandable in such a difficult and often dark world - God has not forgotten you!! He is not distant - in fact, the only distance between us and him is the distance that we ourselves create. I was reading the book of Esther in the Old Testament this morning - such an awesome book! It is a reminder of the presence of God even when all hope seems lost. It is a testimony to His faithfulness and power. If you have never read Esther - pick up your bible and find it. . . It will read more like a movie plot than an Old Testament book, and the outcome will inspire and encourage you!

Our God is serious about keeping his promises. He kept them with the Israelites even when they turned their backs on him, and he will keep them with us when we do the same. The bible is full of reminders of God's promise to be close to you when you choose to walk with him. Here are just a few. May these verses be a comfort to you, a source of hope, and a source of motivation to know this God who longs to be close to you.

"What's the price of a pet canary? Some loose change, right? And God cares what happens to it even more than you do. He pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail - even numbering the hairs on your head! So don't be intimidated by all this bully talk. You're worth more than a million canaries." Matthew 10:29-31

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:37-39

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

Where's the love?

Being a teenager is hard. I think its even harder today than it was 10 years ago. Just getting through it all - dealing with the drama of friends and relationships - is filled with enough frustration. . . then add to that trying to actually live out your faith. I have so much respect for young women who have dedicated themselves to following Jesus even when everything and everyone around them is telling them its ridiculous.

It would be nice if I could tell my girls that once they fully devote themselves to God the road is easy. But the truth is, they'll have to deal with battles not only within themselves, but also with the world. The book of John says it like this:

"If you find the godless world is hating you, remember it got its start
hating me. If you lived on the world's terms, the world would love you as
one of its own. But since I picked you out to live on God's terms and no
longer on the world's terms, the world is going to hate you." John
15:18-19

Our reality is that if the world hated Jesus - the very man who came to earth to die for them - then the world is not going to be too fond of those of us who truly love Him. The problem is that Jesus wasn't just a nice guy and a pushover. He spoke truths that sometimes required life change. If you are going to really walk with Jesus, then you simply cannot live like everyone else. That's what John means when he says that we are to live on God's terms. There are things that the world says are ok but that God says are evil. And the people who long to linger in the evil of this world are not going to bless and encourage those of us who want to call out evil for what it truly is.

So, really, this should be an encouragement to those of you who are feeling hated. The world hated Jesus too, you know. . . But there is more encouragement here that just the knowledge that you are following in your Savior's footsteps. We have not only Jesus' example as we walk with God, we have also His help and presence.

"Remain in me, and I will remain in you." John 15:4

He walked before us on these dirty roads we face, and now he longs to walk with us!! Even if the whole entire world is against you - the Creator of the Universe is longing to live within you! There is nothing that you cannot accomplish, no joy that cannot be made complete when you have the living presence of God.

So, where are you at with the world? Some of us are still consumed with wanting the world (and the people in it) to love us. So, we live kind of a 'closet' Christianity. We love God, but not enough to change our lives in any way that would make someone look twice. Others of us are halfway there. . . We've made a valiant effort to live as Jesus did, to truly walk the talk. But sometimes we just can't help but feel embarrassed and crawl back into our shell. Its hard to know that people don't like you. . . and its hard to say no to the things of this world that seem so good. Then there are a few who somehow have managed to forsake everything in this world for the cause of Jesus. They are willing to suffer all kinds of persecution and judgement for their faith. They consider everything a loss except knowing Him.

My prayer today is that no matter where you are on this journey - you are convinced that Jesus is worth any sacrifice. He certainly thought that of you. . . So take a reflective look at your life. Is the world a little too in love with you (and you with it)? Are you more concerned with pleasing your friends than doing what Jesus would do?

It ain't easy - but girls - there is NO greater joy than walking with God.

Today, this is my prayer for you:

"Be assured that from the first day we heard of you, we haven't stopped
praying for you, asking God to give you wise minds and spirits attuned to
his will, and so acquire a thorough understanding of the ways in which God
works. We pray that you'll live well for the Master, making him proud of
you as you work hard in his orchard. As you learn more and more how God
works, you will learn how to do your work. We pray that you'll
have the strength to stick it out over the long haul - not the grim
strength of gritting your teeth but the glory-strength God gives. It is
strength that endures the unendurable and spills over into joy, thanking the
Father who makes us strong enough to take part in everything bright and
beautiful that he has for us." Colossians 1:9-12

Inspired. . .

One of my girls asked me a question the other day that has me thinking. . . We were talking about growing in our walks with God, and she asked, "How do you read your bible?" At first, I started thinking practical tips for reading and understanding God's Word - but after thinking about it, I'm not so sure that's what she really meant. I think most of us know how to read our bibles. . . the problem is that we don't do it. I think maybe the more accurate question is this - "How do you stay inspired to read your bible consistently and meaningfully?" Now that, my friends, is a difficult question. I've heard so many different philosophies on this topic. Some people argue that discipline and consistency is key. It doesn't matter if you feel like reading your bible, if you do it enough, eventually you will enjoy it and get something out of it. Others have asserted that the only truly spiritual people they have known are those who arise before the sun every day to spend a lengthy amount of time in prayer and study.

Truly, I think those things are awesome. I just can't do 'em. Take today for example. I'm feeling pretty wiped. . . Yesterday we took the youth group to Noah's Ark. It was a long, fun, exhausting day. I got to bed around midnight, and my angel of a boy was pit-patting around at about 6 am. It may come as a surprise to you, but I was not up at 5 am reading and praying. I was sleeping. And though I have recovered to some extent by now, if you handed me my bible and told me I needed to read whether I felt like it or not I would probably say something sarcastic and walk away. Here is my reality: sometimes I awake in the morning early enough to make a pot of coffee, listen to some good worship and spend some seriously awesome time with Jesus in God's word. Some days I find a quiet moment during nap time to curl up with a blanket and my bible and refresh my soul for a bit. And if I'm going to be totally honest here, there are also days when I don't do it at all.

Before you write me off as a total failure as a Christian woman, let me just say this. I LOVE Jesus with all of my heart and all that I am. Every day I wake up longing to be filled with HIS presence, to walk with HIM, to honor HIM in all that I do. Sometimes that longing is met through extended time in His word. Sometimes its met sitting at my piano pouring out my heart in my music. Sometimes its met in a coffee shop with a dear friend who challenges and encourages me in my faith.

I certainly am no expert in this girls, but if you want my advice, here it is: love God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind. If you aren't reading your bible at all, then something is not quite right. Pray to God - ask Him to start a fire in your soul, a passion for knowing Him more!! When you feel that little nudge to get into the Word - no matter what time of day or where you are - take the time and do it! Invest in some powerful worship music, and when your heart is longing to feel close to your Savior but you can't muster the energy or drive to study the Word, just listen to the words of others and let them speak for you.

Whatever you do, don't make rules for yourself that you will never be able to follow. Give yourself the grace to follow Jesus however He is instructing you to today. Oh that we would be women who live every moment for Him - letting every day be a different but equally passionate expression of our gratefulness and love for what He has done for us!!

Now, girls, go read your bible.

He's not finished with me yet. . .

Have you ever felt like there were struggles in your life that you could just never defeat? I have my own little list of issues. . . =) I've always been a talker - I remember my dad joking with me when he dropped me off at sleepovers as a kid, "And remember to let your friends talk too, Erin." The problem is that when such a large quantity of words continually comes out of your mouth you can bet that some of them would have been better left unsaid.

Add to my insatiable desire to talk an overwhelming sense of insecurity, and you have a perfect breeding ground for gossip!! arg. . . I have this vivid and ugly memory of the first time I was gossiping about a friend and then turned around to realize that she was right behind me. You would think that those kinds of experiences would teach you to keep your mouth shut, right? Well, somehow I keep having to learn that lesson over and over again. This is definitely one area where I have often felt like I would never be able to change. . .

But God is good girls - and what we see as impossible is often exactly what God wants to do!! A few months back a friend entrusted me with some very sensitive and private information that I was not to share with anyone. Now, its not like I would have immediately gone and told everyone I know. . . but honestly, over time I would have found excuses to share the exciting news (like, oh she doesn't even know this person - I can certainly tell them). But guess what - I truly didn't share with anyone!! Now I have this wonderful example of how truly freeing it is when we choose to live by God's standards. He wants us to be faithful friends, speaking only words that would lift up and encourage. And when we do that - the rewards are huge!!

It might have taken 28 long years to make any progress in this area, and I am certain that He's got lots more lessons in store, but it is SO exciting and encouraging to see that even now I can grow, change, and day by day reflect more and more of the love of my Savior.

It makes me think of this fabulous song by Brandon Heath,

"There is hope for me yet, because God won't forget, all the plans He's made for
me - I'll have to wait and see. . . He's not finished with me yet."

Praise God that He continues to help us even after we've failed a thousand times. I don't know what your struggle is, but I pray that you know He can work in your heart and change you!! There is no greater freedom and joy than truly living as God intended for you to live. Entrust your struggles to Him today - and when the opportunity comes for you to be faithful - don't let ANYTHING get in your way!!

"So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the
outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where
God is making new life, not a day goes by without His unfolding grace."
2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (the message)

Connecting the Dots

We are all wired differently. No two have the exact same personality, gifts or tastes. I think that is awesome. I love that I can learn from anyone - that there will always be people who are better at certain things, and that I will always be able to teach them something else. I majored in music education, so there definitely is a teacher in me. I love sharing what I'm learning - whether its a passion for music or a revelation about my God and Savior. So, here I am! Finding an outlet for the inspirations that I just can't move on without sharing. I am hoping that this little blog will be a source of encouragement and inspiration for girls of all ages who want to grow and learn alongside me. Its not that I have it all together, only that I have a different perspective, and sometimes we learn the most when someone else connects the dots.

So you'll hear from me when I learn something new, read a good book, have a powerful conversation, or experience a total ah-ha! moment. And as I share, I hope you will share too. I believe that there are things I will never really know unless YOU teach me. So let's go - hearts and minds wide open!!