Facebook or Friends

A few weeks back I wrote a post about loving Jesus more than Facebook, and I committed to pondering the issue on a personal level. Here is my conclusion: I do not love Facebook more than Jesus, but I think Facebook might be creating a bit of a stumbling block between me and making new friends (which, although it is a different kind of problem, is still quite unfortunate and grave). Seriously.

7 months ago we moved to a new city and began work in a different church. I kinda thought I'd be like a magnet and some new BFFs would just find their way to me without much intentionality or effort on my part. Amazingly, that has not happened. And I think its because of Facebook. No, really, I think its true. When God made me He gave me this intense need for friendship and community. I love being with friends, having fun, analyzing life together. . . but who needs friends when you can log on to Facebook at any given hour and fill that hole with incomplete but somewhat satisfactory interactions with people who were at some point in your life 'close?'

If I didn't have Facebook to turn to when I needed some relational connection I think I would have been more intentional about making time and reaching out. . . I think I'd have more friends if I didn't have Facebook.

Weird.

Anyway, I'm going to do a little experiment. We'll see if I'm faithful. . . The plan is that for 1 month I will not log on to Facebook more than 2 times a day. Once in the morning and once in the evening (well, now that I read that it sounds a little ridiculous. . . for heaven's sake, how often was I checking Facebook before?). My hope and prayer is that by the end I'll have found deeper fulfillment in real human contact; that I will have made some actual friends.

There is nothing spiritual about this plan. . . just me peeling back another layer so you can see what is real. I recognize that it might sound a little ridiculous, but you know what? I am totally ok with that. =)

Saran Wrap River

When I was 6 I dug a little trench behind our garage and lined it with Saran Wrap in hopes of creating a girl-made river in our backyard. My plan was to create this river and then baptize the little girl next door in it. Now, the denomination in which I was raised didn’t encourage these kinds of things, exactly, but I knew that in the case of an emergency a layperson could administer this particular sacrament, and I was quite certain that God would feel that the baptism of my neighbor qualified as an emergency. The plan fell apart, though, because for some unknown reason lining the trench with Saran Wrap didn’t prove to be an effective means of retaining water. And, I am guessing that tricking my neighbor into getting baptized in my backyard would not have been an effective means of evangelism either.

And that right there, my friends, is the inspiration for what I’m about to write. Not the mechanics of building bodies of water behind our houses, but the beautiful possibility of moving from well-intentioned but totally misguided ways of living out our faith to radical, transformational, and totally realistic means of living like Jesus in this crazy world.

You see, my intentions in building a river were noble, but I was totally missing the mark. The more effective way of engaging my neighbor would have just been to love her, pray for her, and then tell her about this Jesus who saved my soul. To be honest, I don't remember much about life as a 6 year old (other than my Seran Wrap river and a few of the fantastic plays that I put on for my family), so I can't tell you if I ever managed to actually talk about Jesus. But that would have been a good start.

Its an important thing to think about, you know; how we can engage the people in our lives over the truth of the gospel. Its important because its the purpose Jesus gave us when He left this world to sit at the right hand of His Father. Matthew 28:19 says:

Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you, and lo, I am with you always even to the end of the age.

This reminds me of scenes in dramatic movies when one of the main characters is dying and raises his or her head one last time to whisper their final words. . . Not that Jesus was dying - far from it! - but that these final words should carry the same power and punch in our lives because He chose them for a reason! He could have said something like this:

Go therefore and have lots of quiet times and bible studies, for the most important thing is to have knowledge, and if you can acquire fame and money while on this earth that would be fun too, and lo, I will be watching from afar, slightly bored, until the end.

I'm sorry. That does seem so wrong. . . but it proves a point, yes? Where have we lost our way and when did we forget the very clear purpose that God gave us? (There is not time or room to dig deeper, but I have to say right here that the coolest thing is that when you look at the overarching story of the bible, redeeming people to Himself has been God's foremost purpose since the fall! The means have changed, but the purpose remains the same. . . so cool.)

So, it is important that we understand how to make disciples; how to share the joy and beauty of our faith with those in our lives. And then, its important that we actually do it. My phony version of Matthew 28:19 sounds ridiculous, but if we are honest with ourselves isn't that the way we often live our lives? We read our bibles (which is good), try to listen in Sunday School (which is also good), and then go home and live for the same purposes that everyone else is living for (oh, not good). We know that Jesus promised to be in us and with us wherever we go, but we talk and act like he's some distant being watching Lifetime while we waste away our days and our opportunities.

I would not recommend building a river and spontaneously dunking people, but how else can you take Jesus' passionate calling and begin to make it a reality in your lives? Maybe by reaching out to people outside of your circle of friends. Maybe by talking about your faith over lunch. . . and not just the easy stuff, like Christiany political views, but the difficult and potentially awkward stuff, like your love for Jesus and how He has changed your life.

I know, that sounds intimidating and totally unrealistic for some of you. But I can promise you that when you choose to actually live out the purpose that Christ has called every believer to live, you will never regret it. And remember - He has promised His very self to be near to us and help us! What else could you need?

It is an awesome thing to receive the grace of God and the gift of eternal life through Christ. And it is abundantly more awesome to be a part of God's plan to extend that grace and eternal life to others.

How do I love Jesus more than Facebook?

Have you ever noticed how skilled Christians are at coming up with really smart sounding spiritual comments? I myself made an impressive one earlier today. I quoted a verse as my status on Facebook (Philippians 3:8) about discarding everything in this world as garbage compared to the worth of knowing Jesus, and then I boldly claimed this to be my daily goal for 2011. Now, I know that you are impressed already - but wait, it gets better. A friend made a funny comment about not discarding Facebook, and I came up with this doosy of a holier than thou remark: As long as I love Jesus more than Facebook I think we're good. Wow. Amazingly spiritual? Yes. The only problem that has been plaguing me since I wrote that is this:

Does anyone know what that actually means?

Seriously! I mean, it sounds good. I think its probably something most passionate Christians would agree with... but what does loving Jesus more than Facebook actually look like?

I believe that this is where we sometimes lose our way. We know the right things to say, but we never dig deeper to figure out what those things actually mean, or what they're supposed to look like in our lives. We find a verse that satisfies our spiritual appetites and then move on and live as usual.

My guess as to why we tend to do this is that we are afraid of what will be required of us if we actually apply God's truth to our lives. If I really love Jesus more than Facebook (or Target, or my kids, or money, and on and on), then how will my life have to change?

The verse I quoted from Philippians is a passionate cry of absolute surrender and total commitment to God and His purposes here on earth. It communicates a deep, heart felt belief that Jesus really is more meaningful and more important than anything we might try to find fulfillment in here.

I'm not going to build some comprehensive list for how to tell if your love for Christ outweighs your love for the things of this world (Facebook or otherwise). Far too often we try to boil these things down to a tidy list, and we end up with a legalistic and inadequate formula for walking with God.

If you read further on in Philippians, however, you'll come to some verses that might help to define the boundaries for a heart that loves the world more than Christ:

For I have told you often before, and I say it again with tears in my eyes, that there are many whose conduct shows they are really enemies of the cross of Christ. They are headed for destruction. Their god is their appetite, they brag about shameful things, and they think only about this life here on earth. Philippians 3:18-19

That's pretty intense, right? Truthfully, though, how often does that describe me? Or you? How often does our conduct show that the true state of our hearts is an obsession with things and people and an apathy towards our Savior and Maker?

I don't know what loving Jesus more than Facebook looks like exactly for you. I have some friends who honestly have quit it altogether because on some level it pulled their hearts and minds away from Christ. For others, it is great platform for communicating their love for God and sharing His love with others. I don't think it matters so much the conclusion you come to, only that you are honestly living out your faith from a heart that sincerely longs to honor Christ and serve Christ above all else.

So, how will I love Jesus more than Facebook?

I'm going to have to dig a little deeper, ponder a little more, and get back to you on that. . .

Here's to another new year; a chance to take God's word to the core of who we are and allow it to change us from the inside out. . .

What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ. Phil 3:8

One Scary Suitcase

I'm still afraid of the dark. I really love that my kids like to sleep with the bathroom light on, because it casts a soft glow into our room as well, and the light makes it much easier for me to sleep peacefully. When I was younger I would actually get so scared of the dark that I'd lay in bed motionless for hours. I was too afraid to move; sometimes even too afraid to yell out for my mom and dad. In college I went on a 9 week trip to Rome and spent a night laying awake, sweating in sheer terror over what turned out to be the metallic handle of my suitcase glimmering in the moonlight.

I thought I'd be over those kinds of fears when I was the "mom" in the house. I assumed that adulthood brought with it an unwavering confidence and assurance that would wash away the silly fears of childhood. I mean, seriously, I know that there is not actually a monster under my bed or an alien in my closet (or a serial killer hiding in my suitcase), so what is the big deal?

Unfortunately, my fear of the dark is not the only fear I brought into adulthood with me. I also managed to bring along the very real fear of what others think of me. If I'm going to be honest here, I have to admit that I often become paralyzed with hurt and disappointment when I think someone is upset with me. I become consumed, analyzing every detail of the situation, imagining that the other person is thinking and believing all sorts of awful things about me. . .

The funny thing is, I thought I'd be over those kinds of fears when I was the "mom" in the house. I assumed that adulthood brought with it an unwavering confidence and assurance that would wash away the silly fears of childhood. I mean, seriously, I know that the opinions of the people around me are meaningless when I stand before Christ and feel the assurance of His love, so what's the big deal?

I don't know. I sure do wish I was over that fear, but somehow it seems to creep back into my heart every once in a while, as if just to prove that its still there. . . Do you ever struggle with the weight of other people's opinions? Do you ever feel paralyzed with fear over the disapproval of your friends?

I don't have all the answers when it comes to issues like this. I can hardly act like the expert in an issue that is so obviously still a thorn in my life. But there is one thing I do know: When we walk in the light of Christ's love, we have nothing to fear. NOTHING. Oh, the world will try to convince us that there is still plenty to be afraid of - and sometimes the world will win and fear will take hold of our hearts. . . But ultimately we can find unwavering confidence and assurance in Christ, and in His promise to walk beside us and live within us (Jn 14:27, Mt 28:20).

The next time one of us faces the fear of insecurity; the next time we are feeling paralyzed by the opinions and judgments of others, lets read Psalm 27 until we're blue in the face. . . or least until we begin to believe that the words are as true for us today as they were for David so many years ago.

The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:1

I don't think David was expecting someone to answer him right here. I think he was being poetic; asking rhetorical questions that he then answered through out the rest of the psalm (which you should definitely read as soon as you're done reading this). . . but if he was standing here reading it aloud to me this morning, I think I'd be tempted to yell

NO ONE!

at the top of my lungs after each line. I don't think he'd mind. I'm pretty sure that's exactly the point he was trying to make.

Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

This world reminds me of the bathroom at Target. Stick with me here; I am going somewhere. Do you ever notice how harsh the lighting is in the bathroom at Target? I might think I'm something pretty fabulous, then I go potty with my kids, look in the mirror, and recoil in horror at the mere sight of myself in that room. The mistake most of us make is that then we actually get closer to the mirror and take a better look. My word - the lighting and mirrors in the bathroom at Target reveal imperfections I swear I would have never even known about!

Then there was the salon up north with the soft lighting and earthy wall colors that always made me look prettier than I really am. I loved going to that salon. Instead of magnifying my flaws that environment made me feel beautiful.

Isn't it amazing how we can have the exact same face and feel beautiful in one environment and freakish in another?

This world reminds me of the bathrooms in Target because it also does a really fabulous job of making us feel ugly. When we stand in the midst of the world's expectations for our faces, our hair, or our bodies, we all come to the shocking and often disheartening realization that we fall completely short. We will never be what they want us to be. In that lighting, we will never be beautiful.

But have you ever looked at your reflection in the presence of Christ? Have you ever taken a look at the girl He fashioned through His very eyes? Now that, sweet friends, is an environment in which you can take a step closer and examine yourself in the mirror. Rather than exaggerating your flaws Jesus reveals our true beauty and the true source of that beauty. When we examine ourselves in the light of Christ we realize that it has very little to do with our faces, our hair, or our bodies, and everything to do with our hearts, our minds and our souls.

If you are struggling with the lighting of this world; if you are examining yourself in the mirror that our culture has provided and find yourself wanting, just know that there is another way. There is a different place that you can go to see a more accurate reflection. Just like the salon up north, looking at our reflection through the eyes of Christ will soften the harsh lighting of the world that leaves us feeling worthless and reveal beauty beyond expression and worth greater than understanding.

As we walk with Him and like Him, and as our lives reflect more and more of His grace and love, the true beauty of our hearts and souls overpowers the harsh light of this world and even the bathrooms at Target cannot erase or distort the gorgeous light that we reflect.

You are beautiful. No matter what they say.

But God told Samuel, "Looks aren't everything. Don't be impressed with his looks and stature. I've already eliminated him. God judges persons differently than humans do. Men and women look at the face; God looks into the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

Rewind

I think I got a little ahead of myself last week. I issued a challenge for you to reverse the curse in your schools; to be the light of Christ for others that they might experience the good of Jesus in place of the bad of this world. It an awesome thing because experiencing that good through the loving words and actions of believers is what often turns the tide and draws the unbeliever to a place of acceptance and belief.

Near the end of my last post I said this: "Jesus came to reverse the curse in our own lives. Today make it your goal to pay it forward and reverse the curse for someone else."

But as I sat down this afternoon to ponder these things some more, I realized that many of you might be in a much different place. You might just have no idea what I mean when I say that Jesus came to reverse the curse in your life. And if you haven't experienced and understood that - well, then it would be pretty darn difficult for you to pay it forward and reverse the curse for others. . . So today I want to share with you the glorious and magnificent reality of what Jesus can and will do in you when you surrender yourself to His leading.

Colossians 3:9-11 says:

Do not lie to each other, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the one who created him -- a renewal in which there is no distinction between Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave and freeman, but Christ is all, and in all.

Does being a Christian ever seem like hard work to you? According to the beginning of this verse (and the verses that come before it in Colossians) we have a lot of work to do when we become believers. We are called to lay aside our old selves and our bad habits. We have to do a major 180 from the way that we used to live. Our lives and priorities are supposed to change, and often in very dramatic ways when we begin to live for Christ instead of ourselves. A lot of people become burdened with the weight of this reality, but in those moments they are forgetting the beautiful truth behind the call for change. . .

When Jesus takes residence in our souls through the Holy Spirit He empowers us to change. Right after it says that we have laid aside our old selves and put on a new self it says that we are "being renewed," and not only that - but into the very image of God himself. I'm sorry, but that is crazy! Do you know that? Do you get that? From the very minute you begin the journey as a believer God begins shaping and molding you more into Himself. So there is a responsibility on my part to continue laying aside my old self, but there is also a commitment on God's part to work on my behalf. Let me be honest here, there are a lot of days that I don't feel like a very good reflection of God. I'm pretty sure that some of the people closest to me would agree. . . But the beauty of this fact is that it doesn't matter how I feel - it is still true.

So Jesus reverses the curse in us bit by bit as He molds us into the image of our Creator. But wait - it gets even better. As He accomplishes this work of renewal He also erases the status markers that this world uses to define our worth. The ground becomes level at the foot of the cross and we all stand as equals when we stand before our King.

If you want a church word for what I'm talking about here, think sanctification.

Reversing the curse means allowing Jesus to do the work He longs to do in each of our lives to make us more like Himself. He will finish the good work He started, and as we faithfully partner with Him and daily say no to the old self and yes to the new self, we will see our lives transform before our very eyes.

Jesus has reversed the curse in me. He's still doing it, and will continue doing it until the day I walk into eternity at His side. Until then, I'm a work in progress whose goal will be to reverse the curse through the power and love of Jesus everywhere I go.

Reverse the Curse

School is hard. Classes can be difficult, friendships are dramatic and inconsistent, and Jesus often feels a million miles away in an environment that refuses to accept that His ways are good and right. . . We know in our hearts that He is with us wherever we go, but it doesn't feel like enough when we're walking through halls filled with hurting kids and kids doing the hurting.

Some of you are standing in the middle, watching with a deep sense of sadness as the madness goes on around you. Others of you are actually on one side of that equation or the other. Maybe you feel unaccepted at school and discouraged by the words and actions of your classmates. Or maybe you and your friends are the ones who are assuring others that they are unaccepted and unworthy.

So how do you make it through every day with so much junk going on around you?

How do you keep your focus on God and your faith in Christ when darkness seems to be winning the battle?

I have three words for you girls:

Reverse the curse.

Let love win in your own life. That means extending it freely to people who don't deserve it. That means standing up for the hurting kids in the hallway and telling your friends to knock it off when they're doing the hurting.

It means giving respect to your teachers - even the ones who don't really seem to deserve it - because its the right thing to do.

Where there is unlove you walk in and fill the room with an undeniable fragrance of love and acceptance. Everywhere you go you replace sadness with joy, and hurt with hope.

It won't be easy, but it will be worth it. You won't regret one day of your life spent fighting for love and being the love that so many around you desperately need.

If you need a little inspiration or motivation for this challenge, I know someone whose life is a pretty fabulous example. Everywhere he went he loved the unlovable, encouraged the outcast, and gave hope to the faithful. He left a fragrance that made those who accepted him fall in love and those who denied him go mad. He made an eternal impact that brought light into darkness and forever changed the course of history.

His name is Jesus. He came to reverse the curse in our lives. Today, make it your goal to pay it forward and reverse the curse for someone in your corner of the world. . . You never know when your actions will make an eternal impact to bring light into darkness and forever change the course of history.