Lead me on

Now that I have been out of routine for a few weeks I'm finding it difficult to find that place of consistency again. . . In some ways that is good. Some old habits that needed to change have been altogether erased without much effort on my part. Writing, however, seems to have been added to the list of neglected activities, and that is frustrating. . . I guess I should extend myself some grace - after all, our life was turned upside down a couple weeks ago. I just have this inner longing to be settled and scheduled the minute I arrive somewhere new. Its an unrealistic and unnecessary need, but one that I feel deeply nonetheless.

So my lack of posting is annoying to me, because there is no shortage of activity going on inside this head and heart of mine. I am doing my best to catalog this experience in my long term memory; cementing this time so that one day I can look back and relive the joys and fears and wonders of the transition.

The truth of the matter is that everything is different in my life right now. I feel like I was headed 100 miles an hour in one direction and suddenly (overnight!) shifted 180 degrees the opposite way. . . Neither direction is inherently good or bad - just different. I am loving this different. I am grateful for this opportunity and expectant for what God will do.

I look to the road I was on and I can see how God truly works all things for the good of those who love Him. I see how His hand was leading us and how His Spirit transformed us. I think about the friendships that we developed and the lives that we touched, and I am grateful. It was good.

And now I look ahead to the road before us, and I am excited. . . Oh, how awesome it is to live the life! What amazing joy and hope and assurance there is when we follow Jesus - really follow Jesus. Its gonna be good. Different in every way, but good.

One day I'll look back on this time and see it as the road I was on, rather than the one I currently travel. I'll recognize the ways that God worked in us and through us here, and hopefully I'll be able to turn my face to the new road ahead and feel the same anxious anticipation and hope that I feel right now.

We keep our eyes on Jesus, we follow regardless of the cost, and we race on for the joy set before us, for the road yet traveled.

Oh, this is gonna be a good road. I can tell already. . .